Walk this journey with me? Learn the shit I'm learning in therapy, the visits I have with the Psych Doc. EMDR treatments, Ketamine therapy, the ebbs and flows of marriage and homeschooling on top of all of it. Being a mom is difficult. It's not fair to suffer from a mental illness while trying to soak in the joy of the little people you created. You're robbed, this silent thief of a disease, handed down to me through trauma and neglect, now haunt me as a mother and wife. I feel like I am never enough on a daily basis and I'm 100 percent sure they'd be better off with a mom who doesn't struggle.  But that is also my BPD talking.   

It wasn't the summer of my dreams. It wasn't the year of a lifetime. It was the catalyst to a slew of mental health issues I didn't deserve. Issues that have haunted me all my life, only recently to be given a name.